Seattle Love.

I went to Seattle on a last minute trip with my mom this past weekend.  We got to go visit some people that use to live in Rochester and be in our ward.  It was perfect and wonderful.
It was everything I ever hoped Seattle would be, and then some.
It helped me put a lot of things into perspective for me and helped me pin down some things that have been floating around in my head for the past week or so.

One of the main reasons we went to Seattle--other than seeing the brooks--was to get some new hand made, blown glass, pendant lights for our kitchen.  They are beautiful.  The gallery we went to was amazing and full of some of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.

As if Seattle wasn't grand enough--and I will get into all of that--I returned home to a letter from Brooke on the counter, and woke up this morning to an e-mail from baby Logan.
Life is so rad.

While we were in Seattle, we got to go Kayaking on the sound.  We met a very cute seal who wanted to be my pet, he followed my kayak for about ten minutes, then came back about an hour later while we were out watching the porpoises that were everywhere!
Fabulous!

I am in love and Seattle is definitely going on the list of possible contends for places to live when I have to settle down and get married.  I've had enough exposure to love and enough butterflies to understand that being married is going to be amazing, but for now while I am young and free I am fully loving the single life.  
Marriage and love will come.  And this--ALL of this--is just gravy baby.


I tend to love quotes/mottos/themes.  
Here are a few that have been rattling around my head lately:
-Turn your can'ts into cans, and your dreams into plans.
-Live a self centric life.  Make that shift and be your own center of gravity--you will pull all the things that need to be in your life in and put them where they need to be.
-be the change you wish to see in the world.




I need to write more.  And worry less.
Do more.  And Think less.

Even if things don't go the way you want them to--you get a story.  You get a lesson.  You get refined.
Even if you don't know what you want or what you are suppose to do, you are learning.  You are discovering who you are and what you are.
Even if things go completely not according to plan and nothing you try to plan ever works out, you are getting experience and learning to adapt to new situations.

Hermes.

 On tuesday, Jonathan gave me a bike to use for the summer--I fell in love the second I saw it.  It's thisrad old road bike from the 80s with tons of logos and little details. We are going to go in on it together and turn it into a fixie and have a custody battle for it at the end of the summer.  If i go foreign for my mission that will be settled really easily...
this dream that has been going strong for nearly three years will finally come true.

I named my bike Hermes.
He is the messenger God and also the God of travel and writing/literature.
 I thought it was fitting, considering what I want this summer to be about.

This summer has been amazing and just gets better and better.  I get to go to SEATTLE this weekend with my moms to go visit her friend Gretchen.

Something I have known for a while now finally clicked last night and it all made sense:

I spent so many years wishing I could have fun and hip people around me all the time so I could be doing fun and hip things with them.
Now i realized I can do fun and hip things all on my own and have cool stories to tell people when they ask "what did you do today?".

You really just have to take each day and make it great. realize this is what I am committed to right now--how can I make the most of it?
Learn to live a self-centric life and be your own source of energy and passion.
Don't waste your life waiting for someone amazing to come into your life and be the center of your solar system and think that everything will somehow get fixed...  Don't hold your breath hoping someone will come along and pull you into a better or more exciting orbit--just be you and do the things you want to do.
You can be the one to pull people in.
Take on new hobbies, goals and projects.
Don't sell yourself short and dont forget who you are and where you are going.

Life is short.
Don't forget to live it.


Here is the latest art the golden calf has cranked out:

Life for Art's Sake.

I try to keep something with me at all times to write down thoughts as they come to me.  I figure if life and the Lord are going to take time to put them into my head, I should take time to write them down.  This usually resulted in me carrying around more non-school things than school things in my backpack and was starting to get a little out of hand when I finally downsized and bought a baby notebook I can fit in my back pocket with a pen jammed into the spiral.
I was really good at writing in it the last week of school, then it got boxed up, I moved home, and I kinda forgot about it.

The first week of my summer was l.a.z.y.  I walked Franklin, ran, cleaned a little and mostly bummed around the house and watched Heroes around the clock on NetFlix.
I am fully addicted and obsessed.
However, right as I was about to overdo it and O.D. on that show, Jonathan called me to ask if i was back in Rochester yet.  I told him yes and the next night we rode bikes around down town and caught up.
We've been hanging out a lot since then.
Even more recently than that, I finally unburied my little baby notebook and was reading through some old stuff and came across this treasure:

"Life for Art's Sake."  This quote by Oscar Wilde perfectly sums up what I want this summer to be: one of the one's that I look back and say "That summer made me who I am today".  It's time to grow up and actually do something with all the plans in my head.

So far this summer I have established my Artist name, started painting again, read when I had time, and started working on my wonderland room.
A weekend of art projects have made my room pretty sloppy, but progress has none the less been made.

As for my art, I've decided to work in all black, white and pink so that people know I am a girl.
I've decided if I am going to make it in the street art/urban art world I want people to know CALF is a girl--I feel like girls get overlooked in that genre a lot.

My summer so far:

Time Capsule

I have always wanted to make a time capsule.  I love the idea of leaving something behind for others to find.
I tried to get my friend Jonathan to make one with me the last day we were together last semester, but he wouldn't--he was being a brat that day.
He even said "That sounds really fun and is a great idea, but I don't want to do it".
woof.

I still think it would be fun, but what I think would be even MORE fun, would be filling a box with all of the things that I love and all of the things that have helped me become who I am.  The things that got me through the darkest days and also the happiest ones.  I want to take this box, and leave it somewhere special.  I want someone to find it, and open it, and have everything.

This is what I would put in my box:
The Perks of Being A Wall Flower (annotated)
The Catcher in the Rye (annotated)
The Book of Mormon(with my testimony in the front cover)
a Mixed tape with the following songs
-this is the first day of my life: bright eyes
-the remedy: jason mraz
-the world at large: modest mouse
-time to pretend: mgmt
-el scorcho: weezer
-the way i am: ingred michaelson
-hate me: blue october
-from a balance beam: bright eyes
-air mattress: conor oberst and the mystic valley band
-island in the sun: weezer
-bowl of oranges: bright eyes
A kite
A miniature Eiffel Tower
One of those safety manuals from a Plane with the instructions to travel as much as possible... and yes I could supply one for the box
A cheap photo album with poems in the sleeves instead of pictures
A  blank DreamBook that they could fill in with their own dreams and thoughts
An invitation to make the life you want to live
3 things from or suggested by close friends
post it notes on everything describing why I love them
and
5 bucks so they can go get something they want to add to the box.

Maybe I will just make one myself.
Who said I can't do great things on my own?


What would your DreamBox have it in?

iMiss

This weekend has been so perfectly wonderful--exactly what I needed to get ready to kick of finals week.  The weather in ootah this weekend was a little bit gross, but by the time we got back to Idaho it was beautiful!  The drive from SLC to Rexburg is so beautiful, the valleys and mountains are breathtaking.
The only thing I am not in love with about the oncoming spring, is how much it makes me feel like I should be getting ready to go to Europe.

i miss:
Hearing "ciao Bella!" every time I walk anywhere.
Laying in the grass in the sun outside of The Colosseum.
Napping in the sun in castles in France.
Crossing the English Channel on a boat.

Saying "meet me at the Trevi Fountain tonight--we'll get gilatto.  For the fourth time today."
Seeing the Eiffle tower with my own eyes.  Sitting under it.  Feeling infinite.
Flunch. (google it)
Piling in and out of that coach bus.
Learning about Saints and Catholicism.
Going to Mass.
Being in Notre Dame.
Gypsies grabbing you and shoving things into your hands.

The Louvre.
The nuns at the convent we stayed in in Rome.
Living in a homeless shelter in Florence.
TKMK.
Toga parties.
French pastries.
Crepes under the Eiffel Tower.


Living out of a suitcase.
Driving through the Apls.
Not being able to speak to the natives.
Being a foreigner.
Art Boot Camp.
Packing up and moving every other day.
Watching Disney channel in German.
Getting pictures of James Franco given to me while we are flying to Spain.
The concierge in our hotel in Spain.  And the man who worked in the store next to our Hotel.
French boys.
High Class Day.
Having to verify on Facebook that I am "in an unknown location" when I sign in.
The crazy keyboards in England.
Seeing beautiful art every day.

 

Most of all I miss living out of a carry on sized suitcase, looking like a beast, and being carefree every single second of every single day.

Thank you mom and dad every day of my life for letting me have this adventure.