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Sunday, November 30, 2008

Home sweet home.

Land of Lakes, Love, and Loons.

I miss a lot of things from back home...              
I miss Collin James Sandoe
I miss Claire Rose McIntire
I miss Xin
I miss my mom
I miss my dad
I miss Abby
I miss Pinkerton
I miss Charlotte
I miss Zuzu.
I miss my house
I miss Bubbles
I miss bats in my kitchen

I Love Minnesota...
I Love the cabins
I love the Widlife
I love loons
I love nature
I love watching the night Sky at my cabin.
I love my family, my house, my yard.
I love bubbles
I love my friends and the people I know
I love duluth
I love downtown rochester

Land of Learning, Latter Day Saints, and Logic.
I love a lot of things in Idaho...
I love Idaho sunsets
I love the spirit of ricks
I love the watching hot rod
... I love hot rod.
I love the mountains
I love the weather
I love get winded when I go up stairs too fast
I love calling my teachers Brother or Sister  

Im going to miss Idaho...
sunsets are not as majestic in MN
It's harder to be good back home
Hot Rod is still cute in MN.
Minnesota is flat flat flat
MN has plenty of oxygen
I don't go to school in MN

A rose by any other name...

These are all the alternative spellings for Katherine Ann Fleming:

Katherine Anne Fleming
Katherine Ann Flemming
Katherine Anne Flemming
Kathryn Ann Fleming
Kathryn Anne Fleming
Kathryn Ann Flemming
Kathryn Anne Flemming
Catherine Ann Fleming
Catherine Anne Fleming
Catherine Ann Flemming
Catherine Anne Flemming
Cathryn Ann Fleming
Cathryn Anne Fleming
Cathryn Ann Flemming
Cathryn Anne Flemming

Fortune favors the BOLD.

Boldness comes in many forms: some people speak their minds, some people stand up for what they believe in--even if it's not so popular--, others put people in their places (sometimes rather brutally).

Im not sure where the concept of fortune favoring the bold came from, but i believe it.  I think part of it is just being true blue.  

I'm 19 and i've been bold enough to get me this far, but I think it's about time i strike out on my own and getting to know the world a little better.

These are my plans for my future.
I plan to finish out my sophomore year at BYU-Idaho.  I hope to go to BYU-Hawaii for a semester or two and eventually migrate to Europe.
I would love to go to Italy and see the places my dad served his mission in.  I would love to go to Japan and see where my mother went to college.

Eventually I want to get married, graduate from college and live life like a normal member of society.  But while I have no strings attached I want to soar.

I think for me to be bold, the best I can do is follow my heart.

Katherine Ann Fleming's infinite playlist.

***As a disclaimer I would just like to say that I think I have finally found myself and I appreciate and love all the people who have been aids on the journey, but this is more personal.  This is what kept me moving.  From one person to the next, this filled the empty spaces and the dark corners between.***

Infinite: (adj.) Without End.
In the modern world, few things are infinite.  Even fewer people understand the majesty of the things that are.  In my world the things that are infinite are the things that have pulled me through, and brought me home each time I fell away.
For these reasons--and many other I could not explain--these are the songs that are infinite to me.  They made me who I am and taught me to think and see the world in a new light.  

The Remedy, Jason Mraz.
When I was 14 I was diagnosed with a brain tumor, a side effect from Neuro Fibromatosis, 2 days before Christmas.   I cried.  My mom cried. My dad held us together, gave me a blessing, and keep us going.  On January 8th I was a wreak.  With my surgery early the next morning, I found myself wide awake and terrified.  I went into my parents room and my father kindly let me have his side of the bed for the night.  My mom gave me the gippy and I flipped on the TV.  There have been few times when the things happening to me fell into place in such a way that the only way it could be described is cosmic alignment, but this is one.  As Abby purred, cuddles up against my stomach, I watch as the white flash from activating the television quickly disolved into the Music Video for The Remedy.  Time held still, I held my breath, and for those few moments the only things that existed in the galaxy were me, the TV, and my cat.
From A Balance Beam, Bright Eyes.
It was in a foreign hotel's bathtub I baptized myself in change.
and one by one i drowned all of the people I had been,
and i emerged to find the parrallels were fewer--I was cleansed.
I looked in the mirror
but someone new was there.
Still, I was as helpless as a chess piece when I was lifted up by someone's hand,
and delivered from the corner my enemies had got me in.
But in all of my salvation I still felt imprisoned inside that holding cell, that is myself.
I was born inro the church, baptized at age 8, and that was that.  My true conversion came much later, in my late teen years.  As a pawn in god's plan, I was finally lifted up by his hand and delivered from the life I had gotten myself into because of the friends I had chosen in high school--now, for lack of a better term, my enemies.
I know I have come a long way, but part of me still feels prisoner to the habits I learned and the life i lived.
El Scorcho, Weezer.
Rivers Cuomo is one of the many people I hold as a hero.  I can't pinpoint exactly when I got into weezer, but I know it fell somewhere between Heath-break and betrayal.  I can remember the first time i heard el scorcho.  I was on my bed with audrey and I though it was the weirdest song I had ever heard; however,  it's catchiness landed it in my head, and soon after my heart.   If Rivers can get through the cards he was dealt and still be that optimistic, I know that I can.  In retrospect, my life has been a cakewalk.  The biggest trial I have had to overcome is wheater or not to straighten my hair for church this week.
Jaded, Mest.
I'll never regret these years...
I've done my fair share of wreak-less, selfish, stupid, impulsive things; with each a lesson has been well taught.  Even though I have been scared--figuratively and literally--bruised, and battered I wouldnt go back and do anything in my life up to this point differently.  I'm sorry to those I've hurt anf for the stress I have caused my mother.  But as far as my own pride and well being goes,  I am not sorry.
Screamer, Good Charlotte.
'nuff said.
The World at Large, Modest Mouse.
Life is like a horse.  It's going along fine, collected even, and then something comes up that shouldn't even matter and all of the sudden you are no longer riding a nice pleasure pony, but a bucking bronco, and more often than not you find yourself i the dirt.  
When all hell breaks loose, which happens about once a semester, I just need to think.  Think about who I am, what I want, and who will help bring me there.  When everything in life seems so unstable I like to have one thing constant until I can sort out the rest.  People are usually a good thing to depend on, but sometimes they change, flake out, or can't help.  I love people, but in these times I turn to music.
I laid on the floor listening to The world at large on repeat for two hours once (and i still don't know all the words).
I got back up, brushed of the dirt, and got back on the horse.

The things that are infinite to me, are the things that always will be: music that says what I can't, characters in books who love and care and help even when they don't need to, families who stick it out and get through the rough times, animals that love you no matter what, movies that make you want to change to world, and the God who made this all possible.


it's like rain on your wedding day.

Tori Amos is a freak.
The only song I like by her is Blood Roses--Alanis Morissette, on the other hand, I love.

Im going to be up all night, Because I slept all afternoon because I had a migraine.  I haven't gotten one for a really long time, so I guess I was about due.  At least I've never had one as bad as the one I got after my surgery.  It's also good becuase now I can get a lot of my homework done.

I tried to write Maximilian again, but i don't know his MTC mailbox, and you need that for dear elder.  I can call the mail room tomorrow and get it.  I know he is going to be home before I know it, because I'm already done with three semesters of college pretty much.
And seeing how fast life goes is really motivating, terrifying and exciting all at once. 

It really makes me want to try hard in school because semesters really are not that long.
I really do  like school a lot.  I love science and math and i do like doing homework,  I just forget that I like it when I'm not doing it and I get distracted by bloon defence towers or facebook or something of that nature.  Even though my grades are not going to be spectacular this semester, I think I learned a lot about time management and I think I learned how to study.  Bring on the summer semester.   I'm ready for it this time.
It really makes me want to find myself because I have got to make up for a lot of lost time.
If I spent half the time I waste playing games or watching TV on something productive, like painting, or guitar or poetry or anything pretty much Think about how much progress I could make.  At any thing really.  I think I'm going to go on a technology fast while I'm home for winter.  I've always wanted to just sell everything I own and go to europe or something.  Ill do that, but not as drastically.
It really makes me want to do something today to make tomorrow better, because we need that.
nuff said.

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Idaho, here i come.

thanks to Kanye's Workout plan
I'm the envy of all my friends
see, I pulled me a baller then
and I dont have to work at the Mall again.

the 7 things I hate about being 19, a girl, and at BYU
-Your friends are all wither 18 or 23+
-Having to say bye to a friend at least every other month for two years.
-You can either date preemies, and look desperate or date boys fresh off the mish under severe pressure to get married.
-missing Maximilian
-missing Taylor
-missing Dallin
-knowing Preston is leaving too really soon

The 7 things I like about it
-Writing your friends on their missions
-not really having to worry about dating
-being a good influence in their lives
-being at BYU-Idaho, in glorious Rexburg Idaho; America's Family Community
-Break the fasts
-the spirit of ricks

I love spam and reese's. Can i have it?

What movie?

Can i just say...
i hate buying food in  airports.
hate it
hate it
hate it
hate it
hate it
I payed $11.48 for the same damn pizza and breadstick combo I can get for less than 5 bones back home at taco hut. thats more than a 100% increase in price.  Thank you American Airways.
So, after a 3 and a half hour flight--more of a nap--a two hour wait in the airport, another hour and a half on a plane, and one hour waiting for my sister in the airport, my pilgrimage back to the holy land was over.  I called us a cab for me and christine, and we went to the hotel where we got this beautiful surprise: "I'm sorry ma'am but the hotel room you reserved isn't available so we upgraded you to a suite."  
Free of charge.  
Complete with ACT II butter popcorn and a bathroom--with three doors.  
Score one.
We switched to at&t today, and I got a ballin new phone.
 and rid of all ties to T-Mobile... 
in one day.  
Score two.
I caught up with an old friend. 
And might hang out with them when i get back to rexburg.
Score three.
i mean it.  score.

These are the things i already miss from Minnesota:
1.  Pinkerton
2. Charlotte
3.  Bubbles the hot tub.
4. The Family
5. Flabby
6. My own bed, or at least Christine's.
7.  Home cookin, and not having to live off cereal and rice and taco bell.

So now I'm in Utard with my sister for the night and we are watching 50 first dates on the TV.  

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

You Don't Know Me.

I am really bad at
-keeping my room clean
-getting up in the morning
-Mario Galaxy
-Mario Kart
-Any game I have to use an X Box controler for
-hard boiling eggs

I am really good at
-Racing the cows on that Wii game we have
-SSX Tricky
-Making popcorn (thank you chateau)
-pulling together legit last minute projects
-Driving on Ice (thank you MN)

None of the afore mentioned matters, but it's still true.

So Listen...

Coming home is always really weird, I can't imagine how weird it is for missionaries to come home after serving for two years.  
I always love going into zumiez and talking to james for the first time after coming back.  This time i got to go in to give him ben's computer charger to give back to ben when he came into work that night.  Not that hard.
"Hey!  I havent seen you in forever!"
"Yea, I'm just home for thanksgiving... say, boy. can you give this to ben when he comes in?"
...james looks at the clock "Hewon't be here for about a half an hour."
"I know, can you just give it to him when he gets here?"
"Sure.... what it is for?"
"It's a computer charger.... i have a huge A project due when i get back, and i left mine in Idaho."
"Oh cool. "
...."well, see ya"
James is lucky he's so cute....
so blessed.
Basicly home has provided me with two things.
1. Bubbles, our lovely hot tub.
2.  a ballin' oversized long sleeve tee shirt from my faja.
Idaho never seems that far away, ever.  Not even when you drive it.  I think it's crazy that I'm 19 and i live in two places, half way across the country from each-other.
I wrote Maxamilian and mailed it off yesterday.  I really wanted im to get a letter his first day or two in the MTC, but im not that organized.  The only thing my mom said about Max was his name is Maximilian?  Why?  That's a mexican name.
I miss Maximilian.  A lot.  Even though he is off track and if he had not gone on a mission I wouldnt have seen him till next summer, just knowing that he is going on a mission makes him seem so much further away from me.  Like on the moon or something.  and he might as well be on the moon for two years.
The crazy thing is i am planning on transferring to BYU Hawaii next year, and what if I see him? I can't hug him or anything.... But Max never really hugged.  he shook your hand.

Currently abby is growling at me because I am using her as a pillow, but it was her idea to lay right where my head needs to go..... I'm just waiting for her to attack.

I love abby... I wished she loved me back, or at least tolerated me.

We have ben told to give a prayer of nothing but thanks, especially during this time of thanksgiving.
I try to give thanks prayers at night and only ask for things in the morning, for the coming day.... but i often forget to say my pray in the morning which leaves me in a pickle if i even need anything.

anyway I though I would make a list of all the things i am thankful and love here so when i forget to pray about them they still are counted somewheres.

I Love 
-Charlotte and Pinkerton, Individually and collectively.
-Zuzu and boomer.
-Flabby, Cash, Cricket, and all the of hamsters, birds, rabbits, fish, lizards, snakes, turtles..... ect. that I have had.
-Bert's Bees Lip Chap
-African American's
-Native American's, and the clothing they have contributed to the Indie culture
-The Simnitt boys
-Taylor Syddall
-Makana Hansen, Preston Trebas, Amy Doll Marie Benkenstein, Kaiter Tot Kiyoko Conard, Tori Lynn Dickson, Mikyla Powell, Beaner, My parents, My grandparents, Melissa House, All of the House Sisters, Collin James Sandoe,  Claire Rose McIntire, Xin, Monica Fix, Cody Skroski... and everyone else I am forgetting.  Sorry.
-Nalgene bottles
-Rob and Big, Chris Brown (r and f), Conor Oberst, Heath Ledger (rip lovely), Shaun White, Rivers Cuomo.
-Weezer, Bright eyes, Modest Mouse and Good Charlotte.  Those are the major ones.
-Music in general, for all it has taught me, all it has done for me, and all the times it was there for me.
-Being 19 at BYU-Idaho
-sarcasm... as long as it is not directed at one person in particular.  then it becomes bullying or  hate speech.
-BYU(Idaho Utah and Hawaii)
-Minnesota, Idaho, The East Coast.
I Am Thankful For
-Friends, Family, and People in general
-Little kids being crazy
-Stray Animals, so i can still hold a cat at school.
-food, clothing, shelter, water.
-whoever invented those little thins you shake into water bottles to make lemonade.
-Milk, lemonade, propel, Orange Juice, Water, Haterade, and other drinks so I dont have to drink soda.
-Pie, cake, cookies, candy, bars, desserts in general, and treats.
-sandwitches, pasta, and bread.
-Taco bell, chipotle, and sushi.
-The world at Large, El scorcho, Jaded, and From a Balance beam.
-The church and all the things I know becuase of it.
-Roommates that don't come home wasted and throw up on me.
-Nail polish remover
-Guitars, pianos, banjos, hards, clarinets, cellos, violins, harpsichords, Trumpets, drums, synth pads and beat machines.
-non coin-op laundry machines.
-quarters, for coin op machines.
-air drying
-Chemistry, math, science, and english
-art, poetry, drawing, painting, markers, crayons, unlined paper and paint.
-coloring books for teaching me how to stay in the lines
-hidden messages because no one is going to read this.
I Want to make a difference
-Love a little more
-Criticize a little less
-Look at a few more sunrises and forget about the sunsets
-love others a little more and you a little less
-help someone you don't know
-let yourself go a little more often.
-Be on time to class, so you can take the long way, and see more of your friends.
-give away your time, it means more than any material possession you could donate.
-Ride your bike when you can, nature is beautiful
-go for a walk with your friends.... don't talk, just walk.

Thats about it.  I guess I'm  little bit of a dreamer, maybe a little hippie, a lot lover, and little  hater.  I try not to stop you from doing your thang, just please let me do mine.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Tori Lynn has had the opportunity to do this really cool project for her photo class for the past two weeks: she takes a picture everyday and posts it on her blog with a short description. I wish I could have had this project because the picture I have for today would take the cake in any competition hands down--sorry Tori, your pictures are great--minus the creeper christmas decoration one--but just bear with me, read the story, and look at it.
I flew in from SLC last night and got in at about 5:00 my time. After going to look at a new dog, my parents took me to Olive Garden to eat. It was really good and i ate almost all of my food and about seven bread sticks. We went home and sat in bubbles, our new hot tub, until we got too hot and then we went back inside. After showering and playing with the huas we went to bed.Today was church, I kind of hate going to my home ward for the first week I am home from school, because everyone acts like I'm back from the dead--it's just really annoying. I have to stand up and introduce myself like I'm some visitor or something. I grew up in that ward, I've been there longer than most people in it. "Oh, what are you doing home? Are you here for a while?" I'm always tempted to tell them i dropped out of college, but lying isn't good so i just explaine to everybody in the congregation that "I'm only home for thanksgiving right now, then i go back fro two weeks." The really awesome part is that I'm going to get to go through it all again in two weeks.
whoop whoooooop.
Here is where the story starts: I was making dinner when I heard it--It sounded like a hamster running in a wheel, but we don't have any hamsters anymore. I looked at the light fixture above the sink and saw it's little furry leg and foot sticking out. "MOM!" I yelled. "Mom! There is a mouse in the light!!" WHAT!? She shrieked."I see it's little leg stickin' out!"...Then it moved and i saw more than it's little leg.... I saw it's little wing."...No, It's a bat."
My mom was not happy.
"What do we do? what do we do? how do i get it? how do i turn the light off?! it's going to fry... what do I do!?" There were about a million things running through my mind. I didn't want it to bite me... I didn't want it to fall and get hurt. I didn't want the dogs or Abby to get it...After trying a few things this is what it came down to.i put my hood up and some gloves on. We took the screen off the window by the sink and using that as a shield. I unscrewed the light and took it out. Little Stellaluna stayed put though and i didn't really want to touch her...."Stellaluna you need to come down" I told her... but put she stayed.
I got some tongs and pulled her out into a bucket and dumped her out the window. Then we realized that it was really late for a bat to still be out in the winter and were worried that she was sick because she wasn't hibernating yet. I also wanted to see her so i went outside and she was just crawling around like a baby. I felt bad and was really worried so my mom said we could catch her and call Quarry Hill.After getting chirped at and chasing her down, we caught her in a sherbet bucket and poked some holes in the top, called a friend who worked at the nature center(Quarry Hill), and found out that bat's can only fly from trees. They cannot take off from the ground. So we took her out and dumped her by the pine tree in out backyard.She was really ungrateful and opened her little vampire mouth at us and beared her little Edward fangs....
I could have let Abby have you princess...

Thursday, November 20, 2008

sorry taylor...

I just got the letter I tried to mail to Taylor back today--I'm trying to be a supportive friend.  I hope he still knows I love him.

This is Taylor Syddall.
Isn't he precious?
I met him summer '08.

The memory of Taylor that i remember the most, was when I stayed up all night, and Taylor and Maxamilian stayed up all night in their dorm and we met in the park at about 5 a.m to watch the sunrise.  After this we all walked up to campus and ate breakfast in the galley--back when it still existed.
Taylor Syddall is giving two years of his life to the lord.  He is such a good boy, he is serving in the Mexico City South mission.  I miss him a lot and i am so proud of him.  I remember him texting me the day he got his call--it seems so long ago.  I hope he is home before I know it.
Taylor loves Nutty Buddy bars, one time me and Amy felt bad for flaking out on Taylor and Max, so we bought them about 7 boxes of Nutty bars, and pinwheels, and a card, and some other things.  They asked us if we wanted them to walk us home.  We told them they didn't have to, but the gesture was much appreciated.
I am so proud of all my friends that are on missions--even though I am not very good about writing them

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

These Are The Men I Would Marry...

The Curbside Prophet:
Jason Mraz

The Deceased:
Heathcliff Andrew Ledger

The Heart-throb:
Adam Brody

The Joker:
Rob Dyrdek

The American Dream:
Shaun White

The Dreamer:
Conor Oberst

The Baller:
Chris Brown

Be it dance, music, or passion, all of these people have influenced me in some aspect of my life--defined me, made me, shaped me.  I owe a little bit of my heart to each of these boys--and many others--and always will.  
It's day by day, moment by moment.  The only thing you can do is be the best you can. Most importantly, never let the hater stop you from doing your thang. 


Sunday, November 16, 2008

r.i.p dreamer

you are in my heart.
tell boomer hi for me.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

This is what the weekend had to offer...

So I'll be counting rainbows
until at long last there's no more,
then just counting seconds
'till we meet at heavens door.

tell me you won't forget me
tell me you won't forget me

promise you won't replace me
promise you won't replace me

Monday, November 10, 2008

Guns, Babes, and Lemonade

The equation to another great day at BYU-Idaho.

Today started at 7:30 like any other monday, I was ten minutes late to freakanomics (like any other monday) and Makana texted me between family history and math--like any other monday.  Me and Amy were shooting the tree in the back yard so I invited Makana over to shoot stuff with us.  He came, Amy went to photo, and me and Makana went to the post office.  Then taco bell.  Then he drove me to math.

We are ending the day off--and ringing in the new one-- right with another Adam Brody marathon.  I don't even know what is going on in this show, but Adam Brody is cute enough to keep my attention through anything.

One word:  Horked.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

I have never been so Happy to see a week go...

This week has been far from amazing, but still managed to have its amazing points.   First of all, I spent a good majority of the week in the library studying for chemistry--i love chemistry, but everything gets old eventually.
Regardless of bad grades on math tests, eating candy until I feel sick (because of bad grades on math tests), and loads of homework, this week still made it into the list of best weeks ever--a close second to the week I discovered Bloon Defence towers 3.
I though things were going to settle down after I took my chemistry test--73%, holla (thats ten percent better than i did on the last one,) but that was just the catalyst to one of the blackest saturdays in the life of Katherine Ann Fleming.
After blowing off Makana's v-ball game (sorry Makana) to return faulty airsoft guns to wal-mart, discovering the credit card machine was down, Amy not being able to exchange her gun, and Trevor calling me to tell me that there were even more complications with nashville nights things looked about as low as they could get.  That was before i discovered Pinky had once again died, and that Zuzu was getting sick again.
Hugs in the car have always been on the list of things I avoid--the awkwardness trumps and affection that would usually be associated--but when it's from Amy and after I have been crying you realize they really are not all that bad.
Needles to say, I got myself to the kirkum, got through sound-checks, and eventually got through Nashville Nights with out too many bumps other than the Seagulls--a band who covered an Eagles song, and they thought they WERE the Eagles, you know what I'm sayin'?...'Nuff saud.
After Nashville Nights Shiela took me and my sister to Wal-Mart to try and get our car resurrected so we could at least let it lay dormant on our driveway.  Makana and his crew showed up, and Makana asked me how I was holding up and when I told him not very well he gave me a hug.  I really love how much easier it is to deal with the hard things in life when your friends will support you though them,  and i really just love hugs from Makana.
The final straw happened in the Horkley's parking lot.... Saturday November 08th 2008 was a long day... 'Nuff said.

How Blessed I am that, taking all of these things into consideration, I can still say "Katherine is having the best week ever!"  These are the things that made that possible:

10:  Preston Letting me Shoot Him With my Airsoft Gun.
9: Snuggle Parties on the Couch after a looong day.  (sometimes you just need that.)
8: Amy Doll Getting her P.B. (hard copy).
7: Grind.
6: American Mall.
5: Adam Brody Marathons.
4: New Friends from Provo.
3: Getting MAD Street Cred. (even if it was not from the most enjoyable source)
2: Having a Pet Cat (even if it was for 3 minutes.)
1:  Knowing that Even Though we are Miles Apart; The Things That Have Happened This Weeked Will Bond us for Life.

Just another great week at BYU-Idaho.